Tuesday, October 05, 2004

"If a man who cannot count finds a four-leaf clover, is he lucky?"
Lanislaw J. Lec

Howdy, thanks for stopping by.

Prepare for a strange mishmash of Guinness-fueled poker nonsense tonight. Lots of unrelated poker content as well as some dirt to dish. And we all love dirt, don't we? So let's hop right to it, shall we?

This post brought to you by Bonus Code IGGY on Party Poker.

Once again, the next poker blogger and their readers tournament:
October 21st, Thursday, at 9pm EST.
Poker Stars
It's a $20 No-Limit tournament, per usual.
Open to anyone.

The tourney is now officially listed on the Poker Stars Private tournament tab. We already have 12 players, I think, and I don't even care that nobody has used my link. Just go sign up.

The tournament is password protected. The password is: iggy2004

And yes, as rumored, The Benefactor to the poker blogs will be participating. I'm truly stoked.

As an added bonus, World Champion of Online Poker, Fast Eddie AKA Austin Kearns on Poker Stars will also be playing. Fast Eddie is still grinding out a nice living playing eight 15.30 tables at once on Party Poker. I would recommend you read my July post when Fast Eddie won the $300 buyin Pot-Limit Omaha Hi-Lo in the WCOOP (World Championship of Online Poker) on PokerStars, coincidentally when I was there, fixing his other computer. Eddie caused quite an uproar on RGP and the message boards with his silly ass chat. Go read it for yourself and hell, I forgot I posted his picture in that post. It's worth reading just for that, damnit. He's not an attractive kid.

Anyway, this past Saturday, my venerable home game was at TeeDub's new spacious mansion in the lush, rolling hills of Northern Kentucky. Had a drunken, fun evening and I only spilled one beer. And I nearly choked to death, too, but that's another story. For the record, I somehow broke everyone at the table, with the lone exception of Mr. Massie.

Big news for the locals here in the Cincinnati area: The Grand Victoria opened their card room yesterday. 45 minutes away!
Grand Vic Poker Room

I called and found out they are getting deluged with interest. They spread half a dozen 5-10 tables last nite and will be opening 10.20 (at least) sometime this week. The card room hours are from 9am-4am on weeknights and 9am-5am on weekends. The lady on the phone didn't know what the rake was, so I'll likely take a drive on down the Ohio River this weekend.

Fast Eddie won't be going, however. As he said in chat:

Party Poker > Grand Vic

Who am I to argue with an online poker champion?

Or to argue with this next guy, Gene Collier, a sports columnist with the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette? Hit the link for the full column, but here's a taste:
Poker on TV all-out boring


Something like six weeks ago, I reminded myself that poker on TV might be a viable column topic and resolved to watch it. Here's the way a typical attempt at watching poker went for me.

OK, there's the deal and let's look at this guy's two hole cards via the ESPN Hole Card Cam. Hmmm. An 8 and a 9, both of hearts. How about that. I wonder what's on TV Land.


Hey, it's the "Green Acres" episode where Lisa Douglas gets Arnold Ziffel an audition with a Hollywood agent she knows. She climbs up the telephone in a dress from Saks to call California with a rave review of Arnold's stage debut with the Hooterville Players.

Sure, Arnold's actually a pig, but have you seen the guys sitting around the poker table?

To be clear, my objection isn't aesthetic, but rather dramatic. Poker is merely the next step down in the devolution of televised sports. When television was new, its sports offerings were mostly wrestling and boxing. No one ever had to ask themselves why they were watching wrestling or boxing. It was because two guys were trying to kill each other. If there's a fight on a PAT bus, people will watch it. If it were advertised, ridership would triple.

But then things started to deteriorate. Baseball, football, basketball, hockey, tennis, golf, hunting, fishing, and now poker. The World Series of Poker has apparently just ended, and to be perfectly candid, had I to choose among the World Series of Poker, the Super Bowl of Parcheesi and the Stanley Cup of Clue, I'd be at a loss.

Poker > Parcheesi
Everyone knows that.

Moving along, I read today that over $140,000,000 was wagered in online poker over the past 24 hours, per PokerPulse. That reminds me. I need to light a candle for Chris Moneymaker.

I wanted to write about Morten's Theorem and the white-hot schooling fish at Party Poker right now, but I've got too many other things to link up. I'll write something on a slower news day, or perhaps when I have more time.

This is better, anyway: a fascinating 2+2 thread for those of you so inclined.
The first post:
Internet poker and taxes and moving abroad.

I know this has been covered and I've read the posts, but I have some rather detailed questions and would like to engage in a discussion so I'm starting a new thread.

I am a successful online poker player. I multitable like a madman and play limits where that can pay off without much risk. I am on target to net around 200-300k / year assuming I maintain my work ethic and assuming I haven't been getting incredibly lucky the last few months (let's assume I haven't been). I am pretty familiar with U.S. gambling tax laws. My understanding is to be completely legal, you need to add/subtract losses for every *session*, which in live poker means everytime you take your chips off a table. In online poker this would be almost impossible to keep track of, and since the laws are unclear about the legality of online poker to begin with it's led me to contemplate moving abroad. I know many of you will say "just don't pay the taxes" but I think thats far too risky. The sites can't be compelled by the IRS to give up your histories with them, but I'm not convinced the IRS can't compel YOU to request the histories in case of an audit.

Has anyone here moved abroad for this reason? I'm kind of a loser so this is much more of an option for me that most of you. Again, given our ridiculous tax laws I would have to pay American taxes abroad as well (at a lesser rate I beleive)so I'm even considering giving up my citizenship (yes I'm that much of a loser). A half million untaxed in the next 9-12 months in a country with a standard of living half of the United States would be quite an improvement for me. I haven't done this yet so please don't call me an idiot, I'm looking for information.

There were plenty of interesting responses if you take the time to dig.

I've been overdue in pimping this poker chip trick site. MtDewVirus has opened an all new site featuring well-done instructional video's and photo's for all you wanna-be chip flingers. Check it out:
Poker Chip Tricks

If you are working and want to kill some time, here is a 22 minute streaming video (WMV) of the Howard Lederer Poker Fantasy Camp from the fine folks (Rick Bierman) at Allinenterprises.com. It features talks from Howard, Chris Ferguson, Phil Gordon and others. The next one is being held March 31 - April 3 in Las Vegas.
Link to Video

So let's get to the dirt. I offer zero perspective on this, I'm just providing the RGP nuggets for my faithful readers. That's what I'm here for, afterall.

Here's the opening salvo after far too many rumors:

Mike Matisow et al, drug??

On Oct 4 2004 10:24AM, some fucktard wrote:

> Is "The Mouth" really involved in some sort of drug scandal? If yes, does
> anyone have any proof, or is this just a rumor? I consider proof to be a
> reputable publication or media outlet which mentions the facts. Thanks
> again..
> ~Craig

As I posted last week, he plead guilty to one drug charge (453.337 Possession for Sale CS Class Schd I/II) and is scheduled for sentencing today. Anyone can look up this information for themselves by going to the Clark County Court information system:


On the left, click party search, and enter his last name. Assuming that he is in fact Michael B Matusow, which someone here stated he was, he is scheduled for sentencing today. You can access various information on this case with the links in the left margin.

This is not just a rumor. Take a look and decide for yourself.

And from his older brother, responding to all the noise. Enjoy.

Re: Matusow's sentance?
From: S.Matusow

Yes I am his older brother. Prison is hard time here in Nevada, Jail is county time. MUCH SAFER. In Prison rape and all kinds of horrible stuff goes on. Jail thats rare.. The problem here is that Mike had "padded counts" against him. In Nevada it is considered trafficking if you carry over 1 ounce of coke on you, even if you have no intent to sell it. Thats a cat A felony. Mike had 3 counts. Here is the basic jist of what went down. A friend of Mike, a doctor got into trouble for selling drugs. He was busted by our local police here in Vegas. In turn, the coward that he is, he claimed that "Mike" knew all the drug dealers and that in exchange for narqing on Mike, this guy would get off the hook. When it was discovered that Mike really did not know that many people, and knew the same people the cops ALREADY KNEW ABOUT the cop then asked Mike to get him some Coke. St first Mike refused but this cop who pretended to be Mikes pal begged him that he needed to get some for "His mafia friendsm and his mafia freinds would be upset if he did not score, so Mike being a stupid moron, complied.

You have to understand Mike, HE CANT REFUSE TO DO FRIENDS FAVORS, HE CANT SAY "NO" and many people have taken advantage of Mike because of this. So for you wondering "why would a top pro poker player resort to selling drugs" NOW YOU HAVE THE ANSWER.. HE DID NOT SELL DRUGS.. I DONT KNOW ANY OTHER WAY OF SAYING THAT ANY MORE CLEAR!!

MIKE NEVER ASKED FOR OR MADE A DIME here. Let me clear that up again,

This was a washout bust, the cops had nothing, Mike did not and does not KNOW THE BIG WIG DRUG DEALERS the cops were told he did. When they realized this they needed to bust someone so they busted Mike.

For those of you who think he is abnoxious, yes he is at times ONLY WHEN HE PLAYS, THATS HIS STYLE. People hate Phil Helmuth but Phil is also a very decent guy,, and if you wondering "why did Mike cry when he lost in the WSOP main event. Well everything at once hit him. He has allot on his plate and the culmunation of a bad beat on the river with all of this, he temporaily broke down.

He was looking at 10 years in prison in which that would have killed him.. So please stop judging Mike those who dont know him, Ive known him all my life, he has his problems like everyone else. I am not making excuses for him he was a dumbass, but IT WAS NOT TO MAKE MONEY WITH DRUGS.. I cant tell you how many players are 10 fold worse that are involved with drugs here in Vegas. It is the lifestyle. I used to hang with these guys at Dres. Studio 54, etc etc.. Some of them live a very fast life. I dont
anymore, Myself I was a sucvessful rock and roll drummer for a time.

We all need to grow up at one time or another.. But you guys who dont like Mike, thats fine, YOU DONT KNOW HIM, thats an act he puts on on TV, plain and simple. I ought to know I am his brother!!



Scott is also collecting names for fan mail to be sent to his brother.


I will post info where to write him as soon as that becomes avaible to out

He will feel better when he goes to Jail and has people write him to make
him feel better. He also plans to write a book about Poker while doing his

I can assure Mike is no real criminal. Stupid and poor judgment yes, but a
criminal, that he is not.

Yes Mike is a very nice guy, granted he can be a punk at times, but as I
said before thats done on purpose when he plays poker. He knows damned
well when you hear him say "Im going to win the whole thing, I am going to
bust you, he is not serious. He does that to attempt to pick up tells from
other players. Remember he and Phil Helmuth are good friends, and Mike
picked up allot of this from Phil. He really is not like that when he gets
off the tables. Yes, he still likes to talk allot but he is nice and
respectful. Yes he realizes sometimes he crosses the line and regrets
doing it, case in point with Fossilman. What you dont see on TV there is
the 20 other times Fossilman kept coming after Mike. It's all part of the
game. Most of the players get along fine away from the tables.

I'm not sure, but is continually invoking Phil Helmuth as a character reference really a positive thing?

Continuing in this vein:

TJ Cloutier

I think this pretty much says it all:

Authored by: Andy Bloch

The post makes all too much sense. You're not fully initiated to the tournament circuit until TJ asks to borrow money. Ordinarily, I'd say that this kind of post is inappropriate, but TJ has "borrowed" from so many people that such a post could be considered a valuable public service.

And TJ is one of the worst craps players ever. There are ways to play craps to keep your expected loss to less than 1% and maximize your comps, but not the way TJ plays.
--Andy Bloch

Damn, I have so much more to post but I'm drunk frazzled. And I'm not even going to bother with the Bonus Code IGGY crap because it's futile.

Not to mention the neverending pimpage of new poker blogs.
I have a littany forthcoming.

Anyway, thanks for reading. Check back soon.

Link of the Day:
Sodomy Begins at Home
This Urban Legends page about an incident on the Newlywed Game describes a catchphrase I drop into conversations as often as possible: "Up the butt, Bob."

All Content Copyright Iggy 2003-2007
Information on this site is intended for news and entertainment purposes only.

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