Thursday, April 14, 2005
"The Party Poker games are still very, very good. This was obviously going to be the case. You were never going to go from 2 games of 5-10 all across the Net to 4-6 games just on one site and fill them just with good players. Even the good players have interesting leaks in their games and the bad players, well the bad players are truly some of the worst I have played with.
Internet Poker Pro
Damn straight. At this point, I assume that 99% of my readers play on Party Poker but for you stragglers who aren't - get your ass on there NOW with Bonus Code IGGY.
Thanks for stopping by this humble poker blog.
I hope everyone continues to send Felicia positive vibes as she recovers from surgery. Of course, I had to be a contrarian and send her the girliest, most pastel flowers I could find. Hopefully, she won't hold that against me.
Damnit, the impending WSOP tourney still isn't showing up. But while we're all waiting, I thought I'd come on here and commence to rambling. For the record, for those of you who can't make the Sunday WSOP tournament, I'll run the next one on a Thursday or Friday night, if we have enough interest.
I'm not sure how much I'll post here tonite. It almost certainly won't be uber, but I prefer to underpromise and overdeliver.
Let's start off with a random photo.
I was perusing Josh Arieh's blog and read the following line, "Tax time is a bitter subject for most poker players." He's got a damn good point there.
I'm still sickened by my tax bill this year. And yes, I pay off all my winnings, unlike many folks out there. This is a very complicated issue and one that I won't give any advice on Except to say: pay what you owe. Many years ago, I went thru an ugly tax audit, and trust me, you don't ever want to experience that. Ever.
It's funny, I kind of enjoy the 'taxes and poker' forum threads that crop up around this time every year. It's a rite of Spring. That being said, I'm continually amazed at the horrific advice and blatant ignorance in some posters per taxes.
Trust me, if you ain't paying, you're playing roulette with a powerful foe. And if you get audited? It's gonna be a case of the chickens coming home to roost, accompanied by three giant condors.
Again, I'm not a CPA. I'm not that bright, even, so take anything you read here with a grain of salt. Let's just say I'd still rather overpay my freaking taxes than go through what I did again....
Damn, there are so many threads and posts on this timely topic but I only have time for a few. Let's get right to it, shall we?
Lots of folks talk about OffShore Banking and Such. Here's a post about said topic with a flaming reply.
Subject: Offshore Banking - Poker Players Guide----------------
From: Financial Wizard
For all those of you winning large amounts of money on the Internet these days and anxious to keep said winnings away from the taxman here in the US here is the "Guide to Offshore Banking".
This system WORKS (I've been using it for 3 years now without problem) however you MUST follow all steps carefully.
1. Deposit said large amount ($10k+) of money into offshore bank account (easily set up by visiting establishment of your choice and depositing PP cheque) - I use Antigua but could be anywhere "offshore".
2. Apply for banks very own VISA card. (With said deposit as collateral bank will say YES on the spot!) On the application form provide a mailbox number (easily purchased on the Island) where all statements and any bank literature will be sent to. This will prevent any "paper" trail into the US. Also register for Internet Banking.
3. Withdraw cash at ANY ATM worldwide in any amounts you like over WHATEVER time period you like with your VISA card.
4. Pay off VISA bill in FULL every month by direct transfer from said offshore a/c via the Internet banking service.
5. Go "on holiday" a couple of times a year to clear down the mailbox and continue to rent.
Note that NO PAPER TRAIL exists as all cheques are now cashed "offshore" and so no reports are created.
You can now FUND and WITHDRAW your on-line card room with the VISA card you've got from the offshore bank.
All quite simple really.
Here's the "Jane, you ignorant slut." response:
So excuse what might sound like a stupid (and possibly rhetorical) question.......--------------
You're willing to risk your stable life (and that of your wife and kids) for a measly $15k? And actually, it's just the tax part we're talking about, so really we're talking about a measly FIVE GRAND.
You seem to justify it on the grounds that you'll never get caught, so what's the big deal....?
Putting aside the entire ethical, moral and legal issues (although if your kids see you doing it, what are they supposed to think? It's OK to rip off the government as long as you can get away with it?), the important point is:
Look at what happened to Martha Stewart. Hell, she couldn't get caught either, huh? For a measly $50k, she's fucked up her life entirely (and her employees and her shareholders). To save fifty thousand dollars, for a woman worth hundreds of millions. It's staggeringly stupid. Why did she do it? Obvious: "to hell with the ethics and legality; I can't get caught!"
So somehow, you're telling us it's ok to risk being hauled away to prison (for a long time) in front of your wife and kids and neighbors, just so you can (illegally) avoid paying something like 5 grand in tax. You have nice, stable home and enough to holiday 3 times a year. What's 5 grand?? That's just mind bogglingly stupid.
Here's some advice: Come clean. Figure out exactly how much you would've paid had you declared this income, do all the paperwork and pay a visit to the IRS. Explain to them your period of temporary insanity and sort it out. Pay the taxes. Rip up the VISA. Stop advising people to fuck up their lives, especially for insignificant amounts of money.
People properly avoiding taxes and using a place like Antigua to do it usually deal in the millions of dollars and have better structures set up than this. Even if they're caught, they have plenty of legal outs. You have none, no excuse except greediness.
Financial Wizard indeed.
Damnit, I'm already too drunk and I haven't even yet begun to ramble. I really gotta start blogging during the day.
Here's a thread called:
Preparing for Next Years Taxes: (Pushing the Envelope for Tax Shelter)
I especially enjoyed this perspective:
Go research the penalties for tax evasion. Between the interest, the penalties, the medical bills associated with getting [censored] in the ass prison-style on a daily basis, there's plenty of "financial incentive" to filing your taxes correctly, especially when you already know what "correct" is and can't really plead ignorance without more fraud.
This is an interesting poker and taxes discussion on 2+2 debating only showing your 'net wins' versus entering your losses as an itemized deduction, thereby increasing your odds of a red flag and heavy losses if you get audited.
Is Following the IRS's rules asking for trouble?
Canadian Online Poker Tax Thread
Geez, my eyes are glazing over with all this tax talk. Boooooooooring. Let's move along and get tangential, why don't we? It's what I do best, after all.
let's link up the great stuff from the big boys & girls. Poker Works, Liontales, Paul Phillips, and Andy Ward.
Here's one of those great anecdotes that Linda shares with us railbirds:
I dealt to Jon Juanda at three different tables for the same event. I was waiting to push into the first table and Jon was in the 10s, stacking a mountain of chips. The 4s was berating him. "You call yourself a world class player, making a fucking play like that. How the hell can you play that fucking bad?"
Jon never looked up or flinched while he was getting the trash talk from the 4s.
I doubt anyone is surprised by the fact that ALLIN Magazine went belly up, at least according to rumours, and the damning fact their web site was removed. You can read HDouble's excellent article written for the premiere issue here:
The Viral Phenomenon of Poker Blogs
I met up with local blogger, Jeff - Rants of a Young Mind, for a few beers at Price Hill Chili last evening. We had a good time bullshitting about poker, the inanity of blogging, and good old fashioned sports talk. I've said it before and I'll say it again. Bloggers are typically brighter than your average bear.
My man, Chad, over at the Card Players Journal just put a post up about the 20.40 game at Caesers, where I've been playing. It's a sick game. I think I told Hank that playing there is a combination of frothing at the mouth and feeling sick to your stomach, simultaneously. It's just unbeleivable.
20/40 Long Live Caesar
Here's a site for ya'll.
THE OFFICIAL BLOG OF FETUS BRITTANY SPEARS
The new Card Player is out. I highly recommend the feature article on Stuey Ungar, the first of a two part series, excerpted from an upcoming book. Wonderful reading.
To Live and Die in L.V
Mr. AlCanHang suggested we try a WSOP satellite for the O8 tournament. Think we'd have a chance in hell of getting 50 players? I suppose we can try.....
Damn, I was just scooting around a forum and found this interesting post that I obviously agree with.
It's a misconception that Party's rake is higher.
People always state that Stars / UB's rake is lower than Party Poker, and that's one of the reasons they play at those sites. That is simply not true.
Here are links to the three rake charts for comparison:
In regards to PL / NL, the rake structure is the same across all three sites, 5¢ / $1. Even though it's not listed correctly on the site, Party's rake is actually capped at $2 for the NL 6-max tables. Stars and UB don't offer shorthanded NL tables so I can't compare (although shorthanded NL is a very profitable game ).
I do concede that the rake is higher for Party .5/1 and 1/2 limit. They rake 50¢ at $5 and 75¢ at $12 compared to Stars' 25¢ / 50¢ and UB's 20¢ / 60¢ respectively. Keep in mind though that Party rakes at $5 / $12 / $20 intervals as opposed to $5 / $10 / $15 / $20 intervals. I don't think the $15 interval makes enough of a difference to tip the scales in their favor though.
At each level:
.5/1 - Stars rocks, UB sucks (they rake 10¢ / $2), Party sucks the most.
1/2 - Party has an advantage with $10-$11 pots, disadvantage with $12-$14 pots, otherwise it's the same as the other two sites.
2/4 - Stars is the big winner by only raking every $20. Party comes in second raking 50¢ / $10. UB loses raking 25¢ / $5.
3/6 (and 4/8) - Stars still comes out first. Party and UB are equal.
5/10 through 10/20 - Stars and UB are tied for first, Party is still raking every $10.
15/30 and above - UB comes out ahead, they rake less at the biggest intervals. Party comes in second because they increase the rake interval just a bit. Stars is last, almost guaranteeing a $3 rake if there's a flop.
However in general, most people agree that Party is the softer site compared to the other two. I just don't see a reason to play at another site simply because of rake. Of course software, customer support, tournament structure and selection are other factors to consider.
I don't play limit so I can't give any numbers, but if possible could some of tell us how much table rake paid per range of hands? In PT -> Game Notes -> Get All. Make sure you only select one level.
For a NL comparison, $6,200 was raked over my last 10.5k hands at Party NL100 6-max.
Stars rakes $3 at a full 6max table, Party rakes $2. In addition, the games are softer and better, money movement is faster/easier, & bonuses are more ample and easy to obtain. Stars has better tourneys, customer support, and software. And from the looks of things, a ton of new players. I guess the new TV commercials are paying off.
Here's today's online poker conspiracy theory or, "The wisdom of Sammy". Good stuff.
I promised this fellow player I would pass along his wisdom and advice to some buddies, so I'm fulfilling that promise.------------------
The setup -- I'm at a .5/1 table, and a guy (Sammysays) is doing the "LOL" whine after losing some hands. Then I limp in late pos w/A-3 suited and catch a straight AND flush draw on the flop. I stick around for the turn and hit a str8 flush, beating Sammysays' flopped trips.
Dealer: Bruin_Eric shows a straight flush, five high.
Dealer: Sammysays doesn't show
Dealer: Flobewan doesn't show
#1862061909: Bruin_Eric wins $11.25 from the main pot with a straight flush, five high.
Sammysays: I flopped a set ..and cant win..weeeeeeeeeee..I love this corrupt sh=thole
Bruin_Eric: yeah, sets ALWAYS win in real life
Sammysays: feeeeeeeeed..the fish
Then, a couple hands later, he loses and I chime in like a jerk, and then the lesssons begin (sorry folks)
#1862143480: Flobewan wins $9.75 from the main pot with three of a kind, jacks.
Sammysays: so sick
Bruin_Eric: i thout you wanted sets to win
Sammysays: lauging so hard at those setups my side hurts..lol
Bruin_Eric: if you think it's rigged, then you playing is a sign of a problem
Bruin_Eric: i don't play 3card monte downtown
Sammysays: if you think its random..your a fool
Bruin_Eric: get help, only addicts play something they KNOW they are destined to lose
Sammysays: thats the thing..I win..because i accept the way its wrong..and adjust..just dont like it
Bruin_Eric: ah, well...best of luck to you
Then the guy wins several hands out of one round...and I chime in again because I'm a prick -- and then the supremo complete lesson begins. I promised the guy I'd pass on his wisdom to some buddies.
#1862293705: Sammysays wins $4
#1862297433: Sammysays wins $3.75 from the main pot with a pair of sevens.
#1862302582: Sammysays wins $8 from the main pot with two pairs, aces and sixes.
#1862324228: Sammysays wins $9.25 from the main pot with a flush, queen high.
Bruin_Eric: i guess the whining is gonna stop now?
Sammysays: blow me small fry
Bruin_Eric: if you're so tough, why don't you hang out at the 15/30 tables instead of just slumming with us at .5/1
Bruin_Eric: i play for fun...i don't think its rigged. Party makes money whether you win or lose
Bruin_Eric: So since you are so freaking dominant at this game, move up in levels
Sammysays: well since you asked..i will tell you dribble stick
Sammysays: another little thing they do to you in here is after a cashout...( I know you dont do those)..but...when you actually take money out...
Sammysays: they screw you for about 24 hours on bad beats
Sammysays: they are over the top with them
Sammysays: set you a table you must play...then rip you on the river and impossible crap..time after time
Sammysays: but about a year ago
Sammysays: I figured it out..
Bruin_Eric: don't you cashout to neteller?
Sammysays: after I cash
Bruin_Eric: it's instantaneous
Sammysays: you dont get
Sammysays: you get punished in here
Sammysays: for cashing out
Sammysays: they feed the fish back part of it
Sammysays: so..after I cash out now
Sammysays: I play about 1200 hands down here
Sammysays: cant lose much..and work off my screwing for winning
Sammysays: but still had bad play and bad beats...
Sammysays: I normally play ten twenty and 5-10
Sammysays: at the 30 /tables..too many working in teams talking on the phone
Sammysays: its true..take it as you will
Sammysays: go to higher level tables where better players are ..those who cash often..and ask around
Bruin_Eric: can I quote you on that, I have a few friends I'd like to tell this info to
Bruin_Eric: my problem with you is that if I thought a site was rigged, I wouldn't play
Sammysays: they steal from the odds of the strong pairs hitting..and feed the little pairs..but on paper..odds of trips come out the same...they just manipulate it a bit
Sammysays: to keep more money in the pocets of those who feed the rake
Bruin_Eric: maybe if you cash out and don't play for 24hr you escape your curse?
Sammysays: just be like the rest of the cattle that come in here...dont watch..dont listen and learn from those who have played countless thousands of hands...just accept what they tell you..and be happy..if it works for you..then its all good pal
Sammysays: have tried many things over the last three years
Sammysays: there is an amount of hands that must be cleared
Sammysays: ask around
Sammysays: dont trust me
Sammysays: but at least..listen
Bruin_Eric: i told you...i will pass on what you said to some buddies, i always keep an open mind
Sammysays: dont be too stuborn to learn
Sammysays: it make sound far fetched..but remember this
Sammysays: where money is involved..there is always corruption
Sammysays: be it the church..the goverment..wherever..money means corruption
Sammysays: its offshore
Sammysays: no laws
Sammysays: no nothing
Sammysays: you have millions of people ..mostly dumbasses new to the game
Sammysays: they have no clue what is supposed to happen
Sammysays: no clue of odds
Sammysays: IF..they just tweek it so the rake goes up ten percent..only ten percent mind you...multiply that times 1.8 billion hands
Sammysays: thats the answer when someone says..why would they cheat..they make lots of money already..lmao
Sammysays: 1.8 billion
Sammysays: I have known for a long time..the board cards are wrong
Sammysays: I pulled a hand history
Sammysays: a hundred thousand hands
Sammysays: and did some reasearch
Sammysays: the five board cards ..offers up a straight or flush draw...or both...79.8 percent of the time
Sammysays: thats exactly 10.9 percent ..too high
Tin foil hat anyone? He needs to purchase a 2+2 pattern mapper to defeat those action flops.
Or, for REAL help, buy the Poker Tracker Guide.
Per Oliver Tse on RGP, ESPN will NOT renew Tilt. Is anyone surprised by this?
My favorite disturbing confession from today's GroupHug:
I saw my grandparents hungover and with a greasy glow after a night of sex with each other.
My grandmother was still confused and unaware she was naked and asked me to come lay down with them.
I said "no."
Moving along, here's a retrospective look back at the early days of the WSOP.
Subject: 1973 World Series of Poker-------------
[Warning - this is long, but I hope it is worth the read.]
A few weeks ago, I was watching the World Poker Tour with my fiance and
was telling her how great I thought it was that they started using "hole
cams" a couple of years ago. I also told her that I think it is fantastic
that poker is getting so much coverage and can be seen on virtually any
night in prime time.
I told her that I recalled seeing earlier WSOP's (mostly 1990's) on ESPN
or ESPN2, usually in the middle of the night and months after the event
happened. The coverage was usually no more than an hour long and only
covered the main event. The commentary was mediocre at best.
Anyway, a few days later I tracked down a video tape of the 1973 WSOP. It
was more a documentary film about the 73 WSOP, not like the coverage you
see today. It did show quite a bit of playing and player interaction.
You know that saying, "The more things change, the more they stay the
same?" Well, watching the 73 WSOP gives you a great example of what that
The narrator (Jimmy "The Greek") was going on about how the 1973 WSOP had
the "largest field ever" with a whopping 13 participants. (Has the field
for a WSOP main event ever gone down?)
Puggy Pearson claimed he never really played Texas Hold'em until 6 months
prior to the WSOP, but then claimed he had studied the game and will be
better that he was the previous year.
The narrator went on about how Puggy was playing with a new aggressive
style that contrasted the tight style of the grand old man, Johnny Moss.
They went on about the new young players, who were better educated than
some of the older guys, specifically a 25 year old named Bobby Brazil.
(Who I think finished 3rd or 4th)
The made it a point to show how the experienced gambles subconsciously
performed chip tricks.
Most of the coverage of hands involved people going "All-In", and very few
of the hands showed any other type of hands.
There was even some trash talking. My favorite was when Puggy Pearson told
Amarillo Slim "If it wasn't for Tennessee, there wouldn't be a Texas".
Lots of spectators, people were about 6 or 7 deep, just watching these
Bad beats - Slim gets knocked out of the tournament by a runner-runner
Now, some things that were different, and that we'll probably never see
Jack Binion sitting in the open at the center of the poker room, taking
the player's buy-ins, in cold hard cash, with no security around. Then,
jotting down their names on a piece of paper with a pen to log that they
had indeed bought in and are now officially in the tournament.
Calling for "Insurance" - this one blew my mind. Apparently, it was
customary, when two players were all-in, for the who had the best hand at
the time the cards were turned over, to call for insurance (if they wanted
to). Basically, Jack Binion (representing the house) would come over, look
at the situation and lay odds of the person with the best hand to get
sucked out. Then, if that person wanted to, he could take cash out of
pocket and buy the insurance. If he didn't get sucked out, he lost his
side bet. If he won, the house would pay him off at whatever odds were
(Note: As far as I can tell, that was how it was set up. If some one has
more info or corrections to how this worked, please let me know).
Watching this, I realized that the only thing that has really changed
about poker is the number of participants and the level of interest. Other
than that, it's the same old great American game.
My favorite response to this post:
The Van Patten family. Two generations of fucking morons talking about poker.
Random segue: Sometimes I like to try and make babies in shopping carts smile or laugh at me by making funny faces at them, and then when their Mom turns to see what's going on I hide or pretend I don't even see the baby. This makes the mother think the baby may be suffering from delusions or mental illness - and they'll get help for their babies early.
Here's a poker pop culture reference that seems worthy of posting:
Subject: The latest sign of the apocalypse-----------
2005 Upper Deck Poker
SRP: $2.99/pk, $71.76/bx
Case Breakdown: 12 bx/24 pk/5 cd
It's on TV every week. Professional and celebrity tournaments, a TV drama
series, movies.....it's poker. Poker has quickly become one of the world's
most favorite pastimes, and Upper Deck now brings the popular table game to
world of trading cards.
1 Showdown signature card per box on average.
1 Poker paraphernalia tournament-used card per box on average.
Gold parallels of the regular set numbered to 99, and fall 1 in every box.
Limited edition autograph cards numbered to 15.
Limited edition autographed memorabilia cards numbered to 15.
Regular Set - Featuriing the top poker players
30 regular cards
15 Memorable Moment cards
10 Legends of the Table cards
20 World Series of Poker Bracelet Winner cards
10 "The Nuts" cards
15 Super Showdown cards
Memorabilia Cards - 1 per box on average
Poker Paraphernalia - 1:24
Signature Cards - 1 per box on average
Showdown Signatures - 1:24
Inserts & Parallels
Regular, Memorable Moments, Legends of the Table, World Series of Poker
Bracelet Winner, The Nuts, and Super Showdown gold parallels - Numbered to
Poker Paraphernalia gold parallel - Numbered to 50
Poker Paraphernalia autographed platinum parallel - Numbered to 15
Showdown Signatures gold parallel - Numbered to 15
Promo E cards - 1:12
Expected release in May.
And even more worthless poker & culture commentary.
Jason Mewes (Jay & silent Bob) playing poker online.---------
I just got back from a Q&A session with director Kevin Smith,
while telling a story about Jason Mewes living with him, he said that
he plays a lot of poker on the internet and has gotten quite good at it.
So if you happen to read this Jay, Snoogans!
Everyone else, beware, Jay Phat Buds may be taking your stack!
Damnit, I'm just gonna wrap this up. I really wanted to pimp some of the great new blogs I discovered but I don't have the
So thanks for reading and stay tuned for the WSOP tourney showing up on Poker Stars.
Link of the Day:
Batman Pulls a Boner
With all the talk about the Batpole and the Batcave, I'm not surprised to see Batman discussing boners with the Boy Wonder. But The Joker?
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